Getting married is the easy bit, it’s the wedding preparation and the management that’s the drag. Sorry to break it to you – and it might come as no surprise – but despite loving your betrothed for the groom, stag do aside, nuptial coordination is really not that exciting.
Allegedly the bride-to-be has been thinking about this day for years, you on the other hand are just lucky that some poor, unsuspecting cow’s said yes. In no particular order here is a list of 32 considerations to keep in mind, all of them may not apply and the list is certainly not exhaustive – please add yours at the bottom, it’s just a handy little reference to any nearly wed grooms …
- She comes first, get used to it, it’s a pattern that doesn’t change from now on. When she takes the ring for most of us she gets the trousers as well, and if she doesn’t get them straightaway be sure she’s got her eye on them.
- As soon as the engagement is officially announced she goes into nuptial overdrive, she may have suggested she was tired before, that won’t apply for the wedding journey but it doesn’t mean you get any extra … attention.
- You’ll have to trawl through loads of shops, fares, magazines and really boring stuff. (Try and show some enthusiasm but plan your diary well ahead so you can excuse yourself from the spare wheel stuff.)
- You’ll see a lot less of your mates.
- She’ll starve herself to get into the dress & for the pictures.
- You’ll be told to lose weight.
- You’ll be told what to wear as will your ushers / groomsmen.
- More family members will want to see you before the Big Day.
- Venues book out early – so if you want your ideal one, get cracking asap and have contingency options in mind.
- Bridezilla DNA exists in most women.
- Her mum will get involved, (and you best keep out of her way, she’s there for her daughter not you and she’s already suspicious of whether you’re good enough for her little girl).
- Her dad is likely not to and that sadly may also mean he’s an unlikely sponsor. He’ll also probably think you’re a plonker however hard you try.
- Someone in her family won’t like you.
- She’ll fall out with at least one of her sisters and or one of her bridesmaids.
- The bridesmaids will hate the dresses and it could end up being your fault.
- Wedding dresses are really expensive.
- Shoes and wedding hair are really important (hers of course).
- You’ll sweat a lot.
- You’ve got to shell out for a lot more than you first think, (get a wedding credit card).
- Table planning is crucial.
- So are table decorations (apparently).
- There’s a good chance the photographer will be annoying / bossy or crap or both.
- Wedding entertainers aren’t necessarily any good.
- Get a good sound system, (music & speeches).
- Timing of the catering is key, so make sure there’s a decent flow of drinks and food.
- Make sure the dance floor is even.
- Fights are not uncommon.
- The first dance is a shocker and needs due preparation.
- Some wedding guests are a nightmare.
- If you do a paid for bar people will moan.
- Plan a decent, lengthy honeymoon.
- Whatever you do you’ll be over budget.
In keeping with the wedding planning, my wife approved this list prior to sign off. She’s also written one of her own in response.
In closing gents, the wedding cycle is no picnic and you can’t please everyone – nor should you try. Sure you’ve got top billing but the bride-to-be is the star of the show, as far as “groom-anly” possible just do what it takes to make / keep her happy.
- DO’S AND DON’TS OF WEDDING ETIQUETTE
- MAKE ‘EM LAUGH – DELIVERING YOUR WEDDING SPEECH
- 10 HILARIOUS RULES OF THE STAG DO
WHAT DO YOU WISH YOU KNEW?