For us guys weddings can be a scary, especially if you haven’t got a clue what you’re doing. Especially when someone tells you you’re the best man and then leaves you to do all the hard work while he plans a tiny little wedding, “thanks mate!”.
So here’s a rundown of everything you need to know about your best man duties from best men experts who have walked the walk and speeched the speech.
"If you can keep your head when all about you are losing theirs...
...Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it,
And - which is more - you'll be a (best) Man, my son!"
- Rudyard Kipling
Your best man duties split into three key areas;
Plan an epic stag do.
Plan early. Don’t leave it until the last minute, you’ll end up paying more and getting less. Using a stag planning company can save you money (like supermarkets, companies like StagWeb have superior buying power). They also know the best suppliers already.
Play at least one prank on the groom.
It’s not a stag do unless you laugh at the groom’s expense. We’re not talking tying the groom to a lamppost (this isn’t the 1980s). But make sure you have one stag stitch up ready and waiting. 16 fiendish stag pranks…
Best Man Expert
“Don’t get too many people involved, ask the stag what he wants to do, confirm date and budget with group members before booking anything, take into consideration how you plan to get there (flights, train, drive etc).”
Steve Roddy - Director - StagWeb - Best Man Once
Help the Groom with His Planning
Be on hand to help the groom on useful fact finding and planning missions (this can be done down the local pub to help him to get away from wedding planning distress).
Help with Any Last-Minute Emergencies
Check in with the happy couple in the run up to the big day, especially in the final week, to be on hand for any last-minute hitches. Offer to fetch dresses, pick up relatives, capture and dye a ring bearing swan, etc. A good best man doesn't wait to be asked, he knows what's going on and is ready to jump in and help out.
Get the Groom to the Ceremony
You'll be responsible for getting the main man there on the day. Check the oil, kick the tyres, make sure you’re good to go and check for any last-minute roadworks to be avoided.
Organise the Groomsmen
Some of the groomsmen could be even more clueless than you are so make sure they know their roles (seating guests according to ‘bride’ or ‘groom’, handing out order of service, giving directions from the ceremony to the reception). Also keep an eye on any young groomsmen, appoint someone to look after them.
Keep the Rings Safe
Check, double check, triple check! Never let them out of your sight. Also, when it comes to present them, place the rings on the flat of you hand rather than leave them in the box (which is harder for the groom and bride’s nervous hands to deal with).
Deal with Supplier Questions
The cake maker, photographer, venue manager, DJ, alpaca handler and everyone else is going to want to ask the bride and groom ‘vital’ questions, but it’s their big day, they should be left to enjoy it, it’s your job to deal with any questions heading their way.
Gift and Suit Collection
At the end of the night the bride and groom will just want to head off to their bridal suite, not hang around and tidy up. Collect all the gifts, cards, mementos for them and put them somewhere safe. If they’re jetting off for the honeymoon quickly you might need to return the groom’s hired suit.
It’s been the most momentous few weeks of their lives so a welcoming committee is one final touch that will surprise and please them. Pick them up from the airport, take them home to their pile of wedding gifts. This will be your last best man duty, congratulate yourself on a job well done.
Best Man Expert
“It’s great to stitch up the groom but your role is to give him a great last weekend that he will enjoy too!”
Jamie Birleson - Stag Party Destination Specialist - StagWeb - Best Man Three Times
Write a Hilarious Speech
There are so many rules to writing a good speech but importantly don’t make it too long and don’t make it too rude. It will be a family audience so if your speech has too much sexual innuendo, whip it out.
Deliver Your Killer Speech
Keep the Dutch courage to a minimum, save the alcohol until after you’ve had the guests in hysterics at your brilliantly written speech.
Receive Your Standing Ovation from the Crowd
Take a bow. Go on, you’ve earned it. Then take your pick of all the bride’s hot single friends. Go on, you’ve earned it.
Best Man Expert
“Don’t find free jokes on the internet, everyone does that and all the guests will have heard them before. He’s your best friend, he deserves better, make sure you have some new, original comedy hand-grenades to lob at him.”
Kye Harman - Speech Writer
So, there you have it, everything you need to do at the ‘I do’ do. Plan early, make sure you stay in regular contact with the groom, offer plenty of help and always stay calm, there’ll be enough people panicking about stuff, you need to be an oasis of reassurance in a sea of supplier failures and suit malfunctions. If you look at each of your best man duties individually it’s actually a pretty simple job and you’re going to be brilliant at it.
You da (best) man!
Need help? Call us now to start planning 01225-474200