Ahh football season, we’ve missed you. In fact, we’d hug you if we could, instead we’ll dig out our scarves, iron our lucky pants and WhatsApp our drinking brethren to agree an appointed time and big screen watering hole.
The opening day of the season is always so full of promise, no one’s calling for the current manager to be sacked, your team’s signings haven’t revealed themselves to be as much value for money as the overpriced and hugely disappointing burger you had last time you visited the ground (so unbelievably bad you named it the “Torres” burger) and there’s still a chance that yes, this could actually be the season you lift the trophy.
And to get your season kicked off in style, here’s a Soccer Saturday drinking game to raise a/several glasses to your team. COME ON!
- A goal is scored – One finger of beer.
- The team you support concede – You must turn your shirt/T-shirt back to front.
- The team you support score – Nominate someone else to drink (put your shirt/T-shirt back the right way).
- Someone somewhere gets a red card – Red Bull and jaeger for everyone.
- Someone gets a yellow card – Everyone takes a shot of tequila (and sing/hum the tequila song).
- Someone scores an own goal – One shot of the spirit of your choice.
- Paul Merson gets a player’s name wrong (including mispronunciation) – Last person to shout “Aubamayang!” must take a shot.
- One pundit tells another to “be quiet/sit down” – Put your finger to your lips and be silent until the next goal is scored (anyone who fails must buy crisps/snacks for everyone).
- Absolutely no drinking during half-time – Anyone caught drinking must go outside and jog around the block before being let back in.
- Ref falls over – Immediately stop drinking and do a little dance.
- A pundit makes a really bad joke or pun – One finger of beer.
- Every time something happens that Arsene Wenger will later claim he didn’t see – Take eight fingers of beer (or just pretend and take none, we don’t know, we “did not see vat”).
- Every time something happens that Kammy actually didn’t see – One finger of beer.
- Anytime a pundit says “Goal of the season” – Shots all round.
- Any pundit says “Unbelievable” – Nearest man to the bar must down his drink.
- Someone says some crap/utterly made up cockney rhyming slang – One finger of beer.
- A pundit says “Relegation battle” – Last two players to put their arm in the air must arm wrestle.
- A pundit makes a Fergie reference in comparison to the current United team/manager – One finger of beer.
- A team scores after 90 minutes – Everyone must down their drink.
- The game ends – Everyone must shake hands and swap shirts with another drinker.
Please remember, it’s a long season, so pace yourselves. Our Soccer Saturday Drinking game is about having laughs, not who will be the first to kiss the carpet, so please drink responsibly, switch to soft drinks for the good of the team if need be.
Have you got any other rules for our Soccer Saturday Drinking Game? Post yours down below;