"Don't mug me off you muppet, I want a totally reem Essex stag weekend to make the lads
well jel of my awesome best man skilz. Thanks StagWeb, you're a ledge."
Essex has produced some amazing footballers over the years so it's the ideal place to "get stuck in" to a little Bubble Football. You'll also find some of the UK's fastest and most formidable Go Karting circuits if you feel the need for speed. But one of the best Essex stag do activities is definitely Paintball, this green and picturesque county is the perfect spot to redecorate the groom.
Sugar Hut - Thanks to TOWIE it ranks up there with The Rovers Return, Queen Vic and Moe's in the list of great boozers. In real life it's a superb bar and well worth a visit.
High St, Brentwood
The Alex - Any pub that has its own games night ("Beer pong anyone?") is alright with us. It just happens the Alex also serves great food, great drinks and a great atmosphere.
Alexander St, Southend-on-Sea
Chicagos - If the Goodfellas came to an Essex stag do looking for good times this is where they'd go. A great bar that really knows how to have a good time. Bada-boom bada-bing.
Festival Way, Basildon
June - Colchester Comedy Festival. The UK's top comedians and funny faces roll into town for a bit of a laugh.
July - Festival of Food & Drink. It's a matter of taste and plenty of it. Great food and booze to be sampled and enjoyed.
July - Brentwood Festival. TOWIE's home town gets musical with big name acts and DJ's dropping by.
July - Brownstock. Morris Farm near Chelmsford plays host to big dance beats and stellar live bands.
August - V-Festival. One of the biggest festivals on the calendar, huge names will be performing on a number of stages.
September - English Wine Festival. Add a little sophistication to your Essex stag do by tasting of English plonk.
"I know who Richard and Judy are. Are they the ones who created the world?"
"I learnt to do my laces because obviously I needed to tie my laces for the rest of my life, but blowing your nose, you don't need to do it in the professional way, you can just do it the Joey way."
"I'm not a confrontational person. I'll only ever confrontate someone if it's for a purpose."
"Don't you think it's weird when you look in the mirror and think - I haven't seen myself in ages!"
It's a big county with some formidable nightlife making an Essex stag weekend something you really won't forget in a hurry. During the day Southend-on-Sea is a great spot to cure any aching stag heads with the UK's longest pier to walk up or a do or die cure on the rides along the seafront. The county also houses some of Britain's most formidable castles, Colchester, Hedingham, Layer Marney... Essex is riddled with 'em. All very impressive and well worth checking out, especially if you've got a video camera, you can create a superb Essex stag do mini-movie in an homage to the Beatles.
Romford Greyhound track once hosted cheetah racing in an attempt to attract more punters.
Rachel Riley, Dame Hellen Mirren, Jessie J and Frankie Sandford are all Essex girls.
Colchester is Britain's oldest town and was once England's capital.
Essex has 35 islands, dull but true.
Faces - This superb venue is typically Essex, uber trendy, great tunes, good looking people and top tunes. This is Essex stag do dining with a touch of class.
Kings Head Walk, Chelmsford
Henry Burgers - A mecca for meat lovers and burger aficionados. This funky bar/diner, serves superb man cocktails alongside what are undoubtedly some of the greatest burgers on the planet!
Market Place, Southend-on-Sea
It's a big, rural county but your Essex stag do will find great travel links with fast trains in and out of London. If you're arriving by car from outside of London then aim for the M25 and you'll find Essex hanging around in shiny white trainers with even whiter teeth just close to Lakeside and BlueWater shopping malls.
"Oi oi saveloy!" - Hello old chap!
"Shuuuuuuut Uuuuuuup!" - Please refrain from speaking, I simply don't believe what you're saying.
"I ain't even joking right but..." - What I am about to tell you is the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth.
"Muppet" - Person of limited intelligence.
"Mugged me off!" - Made me look rather silly.
"Right" - Very
"A sort" - An attractive lady
"Reem" - Good/cool/smart
"Well jel" - Very jealous
"He was with this right reem sort and we was well jel but then she mugged him off, the muppet." - He was with a very attractive lady and I have to say we were rather jealous but she made him look a bit of a fool, the silly nincompoop.
If you're looking for an epic location for the weekend to beat all weekends, then an Essex stag do could be just what you're looking for. Essex is a county built on partying and looking good. Forget TOWIE, Essex has been perfecting it's wide-boy swagger for years, stags here like to arrive in more style, race faster, laugher harder, shooter harder than most stag weekends and some of the activities on offer really do pack a punch!
Even Essex girl Rachel Riley's maths wouldn't be able to get you a better deal than StagWeb. Sounds like a bold claim but we're happy to prove it and we don't even need a big board and giant marker.
When you book your hotel/activities/nightlife as a single group you'll be paying the full rate, at StagWeb we've been booking stag weekends since 2002 and have helped over 450,000 people get away on their pre-wedding parties. Because of the large numbers of groups we book we're able to secure really good deals. This are great rates we can pass on to you.
Our philosophy is simple, we aim to save our groups time, hassle and money while still providing the very highest quality weekends. That means our Essex stag party groups will not just book with us again but they'll also tell their friends.
Yes, Essex boys are a bit flash and tend to be a bit loud but they have so much to shout about. Essex is packed with some simply top notch stag action, paintball sites, bubble football, go karts, Essex boys like to try and do things bigger and better so you'll find some top notch activities waiting for you.
While the daytime action is epic, it's the nightlife that Essex is really famous for. Essex stag weekends get to sample some truly spectacular nightlife that is suitably "Off the hook!". Are Essex girls as fit as they look on TV...? Yes, they definitely are, but they're certainly not as daft as the jokes might make you think. You have been warned.
So if you're ready to come and have a go at everything an Essex stag do has to offer then put StagWeb to the test. Send us a brief enquiry or call us on 01225 474200 and we'll send you a no obligation, hassle free quote. It's even simpler than Joey Essex so get in touch today and we'll help get your Essex stag weekend started.
Need help? Call us now to start planning 01225-474200